Play Therapy: Supporting Positive Relationships and Building Resilience in Challenging Times
By Alexandra Norton
The prevalence of mental health challenges in children is increasing at an alarming rate. With the current pandemic, the number of mental health challenges is only going to continue secondary to forced isolations and minimal social contact with the external world. Numerous studies are being performed on Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), such as this pandemic, and the psychological, physical and biological, long-term effects on children, adolescents and adults. For children, it is difficult to process and conceptualize these experiences. Play is the language of children. Play therapy interventions are appropriate for supporting children throughout the healing, and self-discovery process. To quote Albert Einstein: “play is the highest form of research.” Play within the therapeutic environment offers children a safe, supportive space to explore themselves, others and their surrounding world. When approaching the child through a holistic lens, a counselor considers all intersecting systems (i.e., siblings, parents, educators) that can support the healing and resiliency of the child, as well as their family.
In my current role, I have the privilege of being a listening ear, support system and co-learner with families in the community. The needs being expressed range from safe housing to food security. Engaging children also ensures their developmental and mental health needs are being met, despite the isolation we are currently experiencing. Children of this generation, along with their families, are facing daily unpredictable challenges that may hinder inter- and intrapersonal relationships.
As we know from Maslow’s hierarchy, every human needs and deserves safety, security, love and a sense of belonging (Schultz & Schultz, 2017). Many children who engage in play therapy lack self-esteem, exhibit challenges with emotional and social functioning, and have been exposed to one or more ACEs. In order to heal, develop and grow, children need positive relationships and an environment that will allow them to release their thoughts and feelings through an innate medium. That medium is play, and that relationship and environment is provided in play therapy.
In the field of play therapy, there is an abundance of approaches with unique theoretical backgrounds. In order to support the formation and maintenance of strong, secure connections between children and their families in the community, I would encourage the exploration of the Child-Centered Play Therapy (CCPT) approach. This non-directive approach to play therapy embraces the theory of Client-Centered Therapy and provides children the power to lead their play in a safe, unconditionally accepting, and empathetic environment. By providing a child the opportunity to self-direct, they build self-confidence, direct their healing process and discover the Self in their own time (VanFleet et al., 2011).
Many counselors prefer more directive approaches as it can be challenging to take on the permissive role; to sit back and let the child’s process unfold naturally. For example, allowing a child to spill water on the floor and respecting their ability to problem solve independently. During CCPT it is important to acknowledge the active role the counselor, and in time the parent, plays in the playroom. At the beginning of every session, prior to entering the therapeutic playroom, the counselor ensures to state the joint agreement of the room: “You can say or do almost anything you want in here. If there is something you can’t do, I will tell you.” This statement signals to the child that all their feelings and thoughts are safe to be expressed in this room and it’s their choice how they wish to express them. The counselor continuously responds to the child with non-judgmental and accepting statements (i.e. reflective/empathic listening) as to not reinforce or punish any feelings or behaviors, and to ensure the child remains the leader. As you can see, it is not stated that the child is “in charge,” but they are leading the therapeutic process. The counselor remains in charge as children require structure, limits, and stability.
With clear limits and subsequent consequences, children learn self-control and how to functionally express themselves (VanFleet et al., 2011). If a child engages in an unsafe behavior (e.g., throwing scissors at the counselor) they receive the first of three steps for limit-setting for that particular behavior: the statement of the limit. This initial statement may sound like: “Kingston, there are rules. One of them is that you can’t throw scissors. But you can do just about anything else.” Should the child persist, the second step is a warning, and statement of the consequence (i.e., having to end the playtime). The third, and final step involves restating the given warnings and consequence, and following through on the consequence. There are no judgments in these steps, and the consequence is concrete. These healthy boundaries encourage self-control and the development of appropriate methods of self-expression that is safe for the child, the environment and others within the environment.
As the child explores and learns the rhythm of play therapy, there will be observable improvements in overall behavior and self-expression. To ensure this growth is maintained over time, and that the child continues to reach developmentally appropriate milestones, we must revisit the holistic model and encourage parent/educator engagement. This is where Filial Therapy (FT) van be helpful as it involves passing the therapeutic baton to significant adults in the child’s life (i.e., parents, caregivers, educators). Under the supervision of the certified FT counselor, parents conduct play therapy sessions to practice the skills the child has learned. This strengthens the parent-child relationship. FT encourages stronger attachments during child-led play between children and their caregivers. This creates a safe environment for families to express their thoughts and feelings, build a more adhesive and resilient bond. Resilience and healthy child development depends on the connection between the parent and child as they engage in child-led play (Ginsburg, 2007).
Play therapy for families is needed more than ever as we survive, and overcome the trials and tribulations this pandemic has place upon us. As mentioned, parents in my community are expressing deep concerns around the strain on their relationship with their children and ensuring their children are meeting developmental milestones. FT offers parents the opportunity to learn the CCPT therapeutic skills so they may become the counselor for their child which allows the counselo to become obsolete. Our families need enlightenment and empowerment around promoting positive, secure interpersonal relationships to model resiliency and build the self-esteem of our next generation.
Resiliency built in play therapy applies, not only to the child, but also to the caregivers. Through play therapy, children and their families can heal from trauma, build strong relationships and enhance overall resiliency. After all, play isn’t just for children; it’s for everyone.
References
Ginsburg, K. R. (2007). The importance of play in promoting healthy child development and maintaining strong parent-child bonds. Pediatrics, 119, 182–191.
Schultz, D. P., & Schultz, S. E. (2017). Theories of Personality (11th ed.). Cengage Learning.
VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Caparosa Sniscak, C. (2011). Child-Centered play therapy. Guilford.